Depressing (Depressed) Post

*Caution - Depressing post ahead!*

With every moment of awareness, there's this nagging thought - that even though things are perfectly amazing around me; there's something fundamentally wrong in me, about me. By what age do people normally become aware of what it is that they want to do with their lives? Because I have no idea what I want with mine! This sense of aimlessness is constantly painful, to say the least.

Not that I'm not doing well enough in whatever it is I do. But when I stop and ask myself, "Is this what I want to do all my life?", the answer is always a No. But the problem is, I do not know doing what could change that answer to a Yes!

Are consultants really wise enough to know what I don't know about myself? Can they help? Or do I just need a break? There's really nothing that seems to be helping me out of this senselessness - no thought sounds thoughtful enough, nothing helps me sustain my fleeting moments of happiness.

Please help! Suggest something/anything that can get me out of this awefully gloomy state of mind. :(

/

Favorite songs, 2009

Now that we're into a new year, I'm trying to decide whether or not to make 'writing blogs regularly' my resolution for 2010. Though it will hardly be possible, here nevertheless is a random post for January 2010, a list of Hindi movie songs of 2009 I played over and over again:
1. Songs of Delhi-6: Right from ‘Masakkali’ (a very different use of Mohit Chauhan's voice) to ‘Maula’ (loved this, still don’t know the singers. Was it Rehman himself?) to ‘Genda Phool’ to ‘Yeh Delhi hai mere yaar’ to ‘Rehna tu’, I think this was an album where every songs stood out.
2. Dev-D: It all began with watching the first promo on Youtube and ‘Emosanal Atyachar’. Though FMs made us have too much of it, the song was a path-breaking one nevertheless. My favorite from the movie, though, is ‘O pardesi’.
3. Slumdog Millionaire: Jai Ho brought the Oscar glory home, a fitting one for all time favorites Rehman and Gulzar. The song will always be special for India, though FMs did an overkill with this one too. ‘Ring Ring Ringa’ has very catchy beats.
4. Kaminey: Gulzar works magic with his pen once again! The title track has lyrics to die for. And ‘Raat ke dhai baje’ has some amazing vocals. Not to forget, there was the unforgettable ‘Dhan te nan’. Aa ja ke one-way hai yeh zindagi ki gali ek hi chance hai!
5. Gulaal: Though not widely heard, the songs are an eclectic bunch. Out-of-the-box lyrics (which is an understatement) make Piyush Mishra someone to look out for. ‘Beedo’ is my favorite and ‘Aarambh’ Rahul’s. ‘Duniya’ is an entirely different take of Guru Datt’s legendary ‘Yeh duniya agar mil bhi jaaye to kya hai’.
6. Songs of Love Aaj-Kal: Surprisingly, I haven’t been able to find any sources of inspiration for this Pritam album as of yet (other than the obvious Naagin thing in Twist), but this was a good collection nevertheless.
7. Ajab Prem Ki Gazab Kahaani: ‘Prem ki naiya’ is a personal favorite :P, though ‘Tera hone laga hoon’ and ‘Tu jaane na’ can be heard on a loop. ‘Tu Jaane Na’s Kailash Kher version is to die for!
8. Tum Mile: A third for Pritam! But (negative) prejudices aside, this album does have some amazingly melodic compositions. ‘Tum mile’ and ‘Tu hi Haqiqat’ ‘s different versions have turned out to be immensely likeable.
9. ‘Goonja sa hai koi ektaara’ (Wake Up Sid)
10. ‘Shukran Allah’ (Kurbaan)

This list, by no means, can be called complete. Please write your favorites for 2009, 'coz there might be something that might have entirely slipped my mind, or there might be songs I might never have heard in the first place. :)

And, welcome to a new year!